sometimes i don't mind

sometimes i wonder how much time i'm wasting... i feel like i'm in a constant state of limbo. where i'm not moving forward, not looking back... my life seems a little stale. i need to get out. live life. any suggestions where i should start? no committments please.

i just read that they are pulling the shirts that say "boys are stupid" out of stores. maybe i can take up a cause and fight the power. why stop there? i should start up my own protest, watch out "i'm with stupid -->" i'm gunning for you. although i better check for skeletons, cause who knows what's hiding out in my closet.

stuck in the middle

i don't know what it is but aaron and i are just not ones for "fancy" restaurants. i don't mind getting dressed up to eat, i don't mind having more than one course, but the whole atmosphere just bugs me. maybe if i was hoity-toity, i'd fit right in. but it's just not my element. i think what irritates me the most is that a large percentage of the people actually think they're better then the rest of the world because they have a little cash to throw around. i always wonder if i were rich, would i be the same person i am now. oh wait i am "rich"

toxic

ok, i'm not a britney spears fan. i've never purchased an album. i've never cared about who she is or what she's all about. i still don't but i just watched her new video and i find myself liking it a lot. i think it's the visual aspect that's caught my eye. i'm positive it's the same thing that happened with the "hey ya" video. the colors are supersaturated and the editing is great. she looks hot in every part of the video. (insert graphic lesbian scene here) what's happening to me??

work it

reality tv has taken a turn for the worse. they are now making movies about making reality television. i know they made one last year that actually hit the big screen, "the real cancun." wait a minute, i guess that's not really a movie about making tv but more like an extended tv show. nonetheless it bombed, that should be a hint producers should heed. i think every station has a reality show or two under their belts. i thought this was a craze that would die just as fast as it came about. they must have the shelf life of a twinkie, they'll be around forever!

rock show

going to chicago this weekend. have to pick up a few things at ikea, probably the last time we'll ever go there. aaron is intent on checking out the place where you eat with your hands and they put on a little show for you while you do. sounds like fun.

girl scout cookie time. mmmmm. i'm sucker for coconut, caramel, chocolate and wafers. mmmmm.

leanne just walked down, gotta go.

rocksteady

so the new year has come and gone. back to the daily grind of my life. had a great new year. drank a little too much and swore off drinking the rest of the year! we'll see how long it lasts! so far so good. come home to find out joe and kate are expecting in august. i almost cried. . . i know how long they've been trying and i felt so overjoyed for them! joe's calling it squishy for now, it'll be awhile before they know for sure what they have and before they give it a real name. hopefully it won't be named after a star wars character like their dog among other things. i get to help decorate, i can't wait!

carrie and her friend dana are coming up here to get their haircut by nate. we'll be doing dinner later, at least i think so. kristin let the cat out of the bag and said we bet on her and chris's relationship. why she told her that, i don't know. all is good though. carrie's a sport, it just gives her more reason to prove us wrong!

less than a month and i'll be on the east coast. i'm excited. gonna see the slackers while there! can't wait!

radio, radio

early deadlines, christmas, sickness and family have plagued my life the past two weeks. it's a wonder i'm still here. it's a wonder anyone around me is still here. i've been somewhat irritable lately. i don't know what it is but i was so ready for the holiday season to be done and over with. there's just so much chaos that goes hand in hand with the holidays that it starts to become overwhelming. i start longing for some peace and quiet, and it's finally come. actually it's just a lull till new years. it's so weird because i used to love it. of course it may have been the company i was keeping. maybe next year will be better. i sure as hell hope so!

true romance

jenny had her baby thursday and ash had her baby this morning. both girls. both healthy. all is good in the world.

went out to the magic kitchen for a little thai. was a first for nate and michelle. drank a little wine. picked up some more alcohol on the way home. did a little drinking. played some board games. it wasn't an extremely exciting night. but it was good to just chill. chilling is what we do best. tired. but not like last night when i couldn't make it through pirates of the carribean. had to watch it this morning. orlando bloom is still ungodly hot and johnny depp is right up there as well. oh to be the meat in that sandwich! mmmmm.

next weekend we're going down to carbondale and the weekend after that we're going to st. louis and then on to robinson to see some of my family. more babies to visit and oogle.

apes wrote aaron. wonder what prompted it. he mentioned dustin being in a new band. gotta find out the truth behind the myth. save it for next weekend.

rascal king

quiet day today. nick is out and hardly a soul has ventured down to my domain. listened to a few ringtones for my cell. hardly worth the money but it would be nice to have my own ring. i hate it when you're somewhere and someone has the same ringtone. i get all excited for nada. might go to a comedy show this weekend. we've pretty got every weekend booked this whole month. feeling a little popular for once. people actually like us.

family guy

long time since my last update. lots has happened since. nutshell: mass + band came and went. great seeing him. talked his ear off. always happens when we get together. spent thanksgiving at matt and kristin's. had a little bird and watched a little porn. funny how that came about. not a very long story...usually what happens when you have digital cable and a bunch of undersexed guys.

christmas is coming. tis this season. can't wait!

lip smacker

last night i went with leanne and her daughter to do a little shopping at a store that just opened up down the street. it was the first time i met her daughter and believe you me, leanne doesn't look like someone that has a 13 year old kid. you know that acronym m.i.l.f. that they refer to in the american pie movies. i can see leanne falling into that category easily. i guess that's one good thing about having your kids early in life.

the clothes they make the man

ok, so i'm retarded sometimes when it comes to my pooch. i was actually considering buying him a set of "dog shoes" to wear around matt & kristin's. they layed new floor and don't want his claws to scratch up the floor. and my reasoning. . . what better way to prevent that then to buy little dog booties! we went up to the pet store and put a pair on him, poor bosco. he acted like he had a broken leg and refused to put it down on the ground. it was the funniest sight i'd seen in a long time. he always seems to make me laugh. nonetheless, aaron wasn't gonna have his dog prancing around in some gay puppy shoes. i can't even believe he even consider it to begin with. but the sight quickly reminded him why it was a dumb idea! i'm silly!

as seen on tv

last night we went and saw elf with will farell. it was an okay movie. not really as funny as we were expecting it to be. a little disappointing in fact. i don't know what we were thinking. we wanted to see kill bill, but it's already left the theaters here, which we both found semi wierd. elf is a movie you'd take the kids to or wait for the video. definetly not worth the $7.50 to see in theaters.

i'm gonna try and go the whole day without turning on the tv. i know it sounds like an impossible feat. but it can be done. notice how i didn't say 24 hours. simpsons finally premiers tonight and you gotta see the simpsons. it's a staple to every young blooded americans diet of pop culture.

nick had his date last night. i should probably call to see how it went. i'll just wait til tomorrow. i'm sure nothing crazy happened, if it did i'd probably have a voice message waiting for me this morning.

sealed for your protection

it's so weird when you haven't seen somebody in over 10 years and you talk to them as if it were just yesterday. i'm not sure if it's better this way or not. i know i would have a difficult time being their friend now because we are so different. you go you're separate ways, but the anonymity of email makes you the same.

lawrence wrote me and told me he's starting up a little side project as a wedding photographer. "a dolphin's dream" is the name he chose and wants me to help design flyers. . . etc for him. i guess i'll do it. i'm not too excited about it. why did he have to go and choose a dorky name?

my dad just sent me an email from iraq. he's coming back later this week. i'll be so glad when he's back in the states. i'll have to shoot him a hello in a sec.

burn for you

i got an email from mass yesterday. squirtgun is coming to springfield november 20! can't wait to see him, it's been a long time since we last saw each other. if i remember correctly it was at warped tour 2001. so it's been over 2 years. crazy! it's cool that we've kept somewhat in touch.

i gotta come up with a place to eat for lunch. let me ponder. . .

she was a skater girl

i'm rolling around the office in some short shorts and 70s hair. everyone thinks i should wear my hair this way all the time. i'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.

yesterday i let nate give me some highlights at his hair school. it was pretty funny. i sat there while everyone around me was working on these stationary heads. people were giving perms, rolling hair, cutting, there were even a few heads propped up on garbage cans under the hair dryers. that was definetly a funny sight to see. nick is there right now, getting his hair chopped. i think nate will feel better working on real people rather than those unblinking manaquins.

tonight is the halloween party down in carbondale. it should be a blast. maybe i'll attempt to post some photos in a future journal entry.

age is just a number

every time i look at the screen (while at work) the fonts for my journal are extremely tiny. i've got to bump up the size to 120% in order to read it. is this the beginning of the end for me? pretty soon the music is gonna be too loud and my bodily functions will work on their own. i can't wait!

throw in an upbeat tempo

ok, it's my quest to be more positive. impossible as it may be, i'll make an effort in some way or another. connie is going to meet with sharon today. . . so that's one good thing that's happened in the last 24 hours.

unfortunately for me i didn't win those roller skates on ebay. but to keep things positive. . . i should be able to find a cheaper pair at the goodwill that look beat up enough for my taste. did i forget to mention that i'm gonna be a "roller girl" for halloween this year? aaron has decided that he wants to be a crack whore so we've been on a quest to find him the sluttiest outfit known to man! we did manage to find him a pair of size 11 silver sandal. he's on a mission to find a tube top although i think a lingerie top and black bra would be much better. he's just not seeing my vision. i was hoping to find a furry short coat as well. we may have to look in the big city for one, especially one that will fit him! watch out carbondale, we're gonna be rolling into your town soon!

we bury our sins

i'm so easily annoyed, especially with those i work with. here goes a conversation i had last friday and the outcome that resulted.

s: do you mind if i call connie back to work with us?
me: heck no! i loved working with connie.
s: do you have a number i can reach her at?
me: i have her cell.

couple hours pass. i try and call connie to warn her about the impending phone call. cell number doesn't work. so i call heather who tells me to call jack who gives me connie's home number. i talk to connie and tell her what's up and she's down with talking with sharon and may consider coming back. so she gives me the green light to give sharon her home number. i give sharon her number. sharon, in turn, pulls beth aside and speaks to her about it. then they come back. place an ad in the sjr and call around to see if any of their friends can take the job. i hate beth, cause she's a big, fat baby and can't get over her insecurities. when are they gonna learn that no one is gonna stay in that position as long as beth is around. and we'll have to train someone new every 3 months because of it. if liking beth was a criteria for working here, this place would be pretty vacant.

eewy-gooey

i've reached a point in my life where i am surrounded by babies. either it's the couple trying to conceive or the ones who are seven months along or the ones who already have a little one in tow. then i start to ponder if that could be me, if it should be me. i was so anti procreate, now i'm finding that the hard anti-baby shell being bombarded with one baby after another. and i'm all baby-gooey on the inside after all. when any little one steps into a room the shell gets another chip in it. i think i want one all to myself, where i'm the most important person in someones life. i think most parents feel that way. i know it's a feeling of selfishness, but boy does it feel good when your kid wants no one but you. maybe i need to rethink this... give it a test run or something along those lines. i'm sure i'll change my mind if i had to deal with it on a daily basis.